Latest Obsession: Lemon Bars

Sometimes I feel like Olaf, the adorable snowman in Frozen. Because like Olaf, I've always loved the idea of summer, and sun, and all things hot...Only thing we don't agree on, Yellow! Yes, crimson and chartreuse are all nice, but nothing says summer like yellow. And yellow and snow goes well together, whatever you say Olaf!

Along with the sun, I love the riot of colors everywhere during summer. It always seems to me that I have accidentally landed in one end of the rainbow. But more than anything else, I love the sight of a lemon tree laden with bright yellow fruit. We have one such tree in our backyard. The past two years at home, thanks to that tree a whole host of deliciously tart lemon flavored goodies ended up on our table. Last year, our parents on their way back home visited an aunt who lives in Hunsur. Geetha Aunty sent some lemons home for me to use. Those were beautiful, smooth skinned bright yellow lemons, nothing like the knobbly, sometimes shapeless ones in our backyard. Deciding what to do with them took another two days, finally inspiration struck in the form of mini lemon bars. I found a recipe online, baked them immediately and it was true love! The bright yellow, tangy, lemon bar and my taste buds haven't lost contact since that first taste.

Notice my very beautiful cake stand with my beautiful-ler lemon bar ;)

some of my earlier efforts

But trouble never stays too far. As usual, I had an untimely craving for lemon bars and just had to bake some right then. Problem, dearth of pretty lemons from Geetha Aunty! Well the good old Meen-Puli had to come to my rescue! Remember the knobbly, misshapen lemons from the backyard that I mentioned earlier, they're called meen-puli (puli is citrus, meen is fish, it's named so because it's used mainly when cooking fish...also this is not the Gambooge of Kerala). I substituted these fatter, uglier cousins of the beautiful, bright yellow, smooth skinned lemons in my recipe, made some changes and let the oven do it's job. End result: Unforgettable! It seems the uglier cousin did have some redeeming qualities, after all! You see those ugly, knobbly things are a lot more juicier than those perfect lemons, and all that juice served to tart up the lemon layer and make it Lemon Heaven. And for all of us who love lemons, you can't aspire for anything more. From then, the meen-puli has been crowned the official 'Tart' agent in my kitchen. Moral of the story: Don't judge a  book by it's cover or rather lemon for it's unblemished skin!

With that spectacular result, you would think I would've stopped experimenting. Hah! more fool you, if you entertained such thoughts. It's me, I never pass up a reason to bake or eat! After 6 tries I think I have perfected the Lemon Bar. I have taken a simple American baked product and elevated it to something that is swoon-worthy. I took Ina Garten's recipe from Smitten Kitchen, added a bit of magic beans here, a pinch of pixie dust there and waved a wand! Voila! We have the "All Tarted-up Lemon bar''. Name sounds a little OTT doesn't it, but then again, this tongue tingling lemon bar is over the top with it's bold and bright color, surprisingly fresh and sharp taste and just the right marriage of sweet and tart flavors.

It looks more like a lemon tart doesn't it, but it tastes so much better...believe me

So yellow, so beautiful

Finally the recipe, now if you can't find any meen-puli, don't pull a face and slap our fore-head. Use the prettier lemons (i.e; the normal ones).

All Tarted-up Lemon bar (Lemon n Lime Bars)

Now that's a slice of Lemon Heaven!

Ingredients
For the crust:
1/2 pound unsalted butter, at room temperature
1/2 cup granulated sugar
2 cups flour
1/8 teaspoon sea salt

For the lemon layer:
6 large eggs at room temperature
2 3/4 cups granulated sugar
1 tablespoons grated lemon zest (2 to 3 lemons)
1 tablespoon grated lime zest(2 to 3 limes)
3/4 cup freshly squeezed lemon juice
1/4 cup freshly squeezed lime juice
1 cup flour

Confectioners’ sugar, for dusting

Directions
Preheat the oven to 180°C (350°F) and grease a 9 by 13 by 2-inch baking sheet, then line it with two layers of aluminum foil making sure you leave an overhang on all sides, this just makes your life easier..

For the crust, cream the butter and sugar until light in the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment. Combine the flour and salt and, with the mixer on low, add to the butter until just mixed. Dump the dough onto a well-floured board and gather into a ball. Flatten the dough with floured hands and press it into the greased baking sheet, building up a 1/2-inch edge on all sides. Chill.

Bake the crust for 15 to 20 minutes, until very lightly browned. Let cool on a wire rack. Leave the oven on.

For the lemon layer, whisk together the eggs, sugar, lemon  and lime zest, lemon and lime juice, and flour. Pour over the crust and bake for 30 to 35 minutes, or about five minutes beyond the point where the filling is set. Let cool to room temperature.

Cut into rectangles and dust with confectioners’ sugar.

Notes* I find you need a bigger pan to bake this in, and if you don't like pieces of zest peeking in your cake, just blitz it with the sugar in a mixer, you solve two problems at once with powdered sugar and zest without losing the flavor. You might need to cover the top with foil, halfway through the baking time to prevent the top from getting scorched.

Sometimes obsession is a good thing, huh! Well, Until next time then...

Happy Baking!

Why are we such a callous society?

For the past few weeks there has been innumerable debates on various platforms about a particular documentary by Leslee Udwin. Before we jump into the whys and the why nots, lets talk about what the hype is all about.

A few weeks ago, an Israeli born British film-maker released a documentary produced by the BBC. The subject of the documentary, the December 16th gang-rape of Jyothi Pande, also known as Nirbhaya to the general public. Now this subjected has been debated and shouted across all platforms and the horror is still fresh in our minds, what with the rapists still happily breathing in jail while the poor parents who have lost their daughter battle it out in courts for justice. With all this happening, do we really need someone to come and interview those criminals and their like-minded lawyers and then air their psychopathic views to the world? She then goes ahead and says that the documentary is a mirror which reflects the mentality of the Indian men. Where does she get off saying that? What does it say about the mentality of the person who gave screen space to those animals who brutally murdered and violated a young girl? She lets him justify his action! Isn´t that worse?

Then comes the part with the public opinion which was divided into three major parts. One part justified and supported Leslee for her actions and parroting her words that the documentary is a mirror and protested against the ban. Next we have the section of the society which was vehemently opposed to the documentary, supported the ban and questioned the film-maker on her motives. Finally we have the majority of the people who lived in ignorance of the documentary and if they possessed any knowledge of it decided it was a non-issue. I for one, belong to the second type and I am opposed to the documentary. My question is, what is the necessity? Had the film-maker considered the emotions of the victims family and friends, of their pain and loss? The BBC goes about lecturing the Indian Government about the Freedom of expression, for the sake of ratings is it okay to forget about the right to privacy? When she is questioned, the film-maker turns tail and runs, why, if she is as innocent as she claims to be? It almost seems like it´s their only way to show our country in a very bad light. Previously it was another British filmmaker who showed us in a bad light with Slumdog millionaire, now it´s Leslee Udwin with ´India´s Daughter´! Looks like she´s hoping for an Oscar too with all the hype she has created.

Then there are those who sit and talk of rape statistics in other nations, compare it and call them ´rape capitals´. What is this, the rape olympics? It´s a heinous,brutal crime that we are discussing here, not a burger eating competition to dismiss it so lightly! Instead of comparing the statistics why don´t we try to eliminate this evil? My opinion, fire that idiot surveyor and employ more personnel for protection. If this documentary where that creature blames the victims and his lawyers support him is aired, our country will suffer more. These creatures who have no conscience will take it into their heads that any crime will go unpunished.  My message to Leslee Udwin, people in glass houses should not throw stones! If you want to make a documentary about rape, do it in your country. And don´t you try to put our men in a corner, not every Indian male is a rapist or supporter of that evil. Do not malign an entire country because you met a few horrible excuses for human beings. 

Sweet, sticky and spicy...

Am talking of lamb chops children. If you thought something else, then you definitely gotta wash your thinking with some Harpic! Dirty Rotten Scoundrels! Anyway back to the topic on hand...Lamb chops. I always feel so immensely happy when there is something as robust as red meat for a meal, don't you? I get excited just thinking about it. Imagine pimping up an ordinary meal with some meat that has been slathered with this spicy, sticky and sweet marinade and dropped on a hot, sizzling pan till it is caramelised, juicy and falling off the bone. Ahhh, just warms the cockles of my cold, cold heart. And if you're eating this after months of depriving yourself of meat, you'll see heaven for a little while at least. I know I did. I swear to you, if you're not careful you might eat up your fingers, that's how tasty they are.

Normally I'd put up a picture at this point. But there was nothing left by the time I found the camera. I think it would be fair to say that the lamb chops disappeared at the speed of light. The idea for this recipe sadly is not original. The credits go to Nigella (my kitchen goddess) and Ravinder Bhogal (who in my opinion is a little fake). I know, I know...that is an unusual combination, if ever there was one. Nigella's spicy lamb chops are simplicity itself as she refers to it, but I felt that it lacked some zing, it needed something to make it more Indian to suit my taste buds. Sorry, Goddess. Lets introduce Ravinder at this point. For the most part, I feel Ravinder's recipes are unnecessarily complicated. But surprisingly her lamb chops were quite close to what I wanted. So came the idea to experiment on my own till I had the perfect lamb chops recipe.

And since I don't have any pictures to post,lets get right to the recipe. Now I have pictures!

Sweet, sticky and spicy Lamb Chops with Mint and pomegranate Raitha
Serves: 5-6

Lamb Chops
Ingredients:

Lamb Chops - 500 gms, cleaned
For the marinade:
2 teaspoons Fennel seeds, roasted till dark and ground
2 teaspoons Coriander powder, roasted till dark (take care not to burn)
2 teaspoons Paprika powder
1/2 teaspoon Ground pepper
3-4 Birds eye chillies, chopped very fine (adjust to your taste)
2 teaspoons Kodava Pork masala, recipe included below (I find that this particular ingredient makes the lamb chop taste even more exotic)
3 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 tablespoon Apple cider vinegar
1 teaspoon Ginger garlic paste
4 tablespoons Tamarind pulp
1/4 cup  powdered Jaggery or palm sugar
Salt to taste

Directions:
1. Mix all the ingredients for the marinade together in a large, shallow dish until you have a thick but spreadable paste. Dilute with a little oil if necessary, but don't thin it out too much.
2. Rub each lamb chop with the marinade, massage the meat so that it's well coated with the marinade on all sides. Place the lamb chops in the dish with the marinade, cover with cling and refrigerate for about 5-6 hours.
3. When ready to cook, preheat the oven to 200 degrees Celsius.
4. Place an oven-proof deep-bottom dish on medium-high heat, drizzle a bit oil on the pan. When it starts to smoke, place each lamb chop on the heated pan and cook on each side for about 2 minutes or until well caramelised on both sides. Take the dish off the heat, pour over the left-over marinade and cover with aluminium foil on top.
4. Place the dish in the preheated oven and bake for about 30-40 minutes until they are cooked. Serve hot with mint and pomegranate raitha.

Mint and Pomegranate Raitha
Ingredients:
1 cucumber, de-seeded and diced finely
1 cup thick yoghurt
1/2 a pomegranate's seeds
a small handful of  mint, chopped roughly
2 teaspoons sugar
1/4 teaspoon chaat masala
1/4 teaspoon Paprika
1/4 teaspoon Sumac powder
5-6 Pistachios, roughly chopped
Salt, to taste

Directions:
1. Into a medium-sized bowl, add the yoghurt, cucumber, half the pomegranate seeds, mint, sugar, salt and other spices. Mix well.
2. Garnish with the rest of the pomegranate seeds and roughly chopped nuts. Refrigerate until you serve.

Kodava Pork Masala
Now, being a Kodavathi, I can tell you how treasured this recipe is. Each family will have a recipe that differs slightly from others, because they each have a special ingredient that will enhance the taste. And every single one of those people are tight-lipped about their recipe, lest it gets out. This here is a basic recipe.

Ingredients:
4 tbsps whole coriander seeds
1 tsp cumin seeds
1 tbsp peppercorn
1/2 tsp mustard seeds
Few grains of fenugreek seeds
3-4 dry red chillies

Directions:
1. Roast all the ingredients separately until dark, but not burnt. Grind all of it to make the powered dark masala. Store in an air-tight container.

* With all the aromas of the roasted spices wafting around your kitchen, you'll feel like the 'Mistress (or master) of spices'. 

Notes:

I put the lamb chops back on a hot pan (without oil) once they were out of the oven, just for a few minutes to make sure they were cooked. We don't like out meat cooked rare. This also made sure the chops were extra caramelised and juicy. 

Do taste the marinade before you spread it over the chops, so that you can adjust it to your taste.

All this talk of Lamb chops has got me drooling again. And since there is nothing left over after our greedy piggy behaviour from last night; I just gotta satisfy my cravings with something else. Talking of Greedy pigs, it's unfair isn't it to liken our greed to that of piggies, considering they don't even eat Lamb chops. Poor Souls! 

Until next time then,

Happy baking and stuffing yourselves.

Forgive me Father for I have sinned...

Apparently this is gonna happen to me in the near future, for as the heading says I have sinned. Of the seven deadly sins, I seem to have committed at least 3 in the last few weeks. Now, before you get any ideas it was Greed, Envy and Pride. You see, I wanted to eat some Fried Ice-cream smothered in Chocolate Sauce with a sprinkling of nuts on top. Then, I envied all those who were eating just that and then what did I do? As if committing two sins weren't enough, I gave into my craving and made some Fried Ice-cream and...I was so proud of my creation, I gloated. I smothered it in chocolate sauce, sprinkled a few nuts on and tucked in like the greedy little piggy that I am. There you have it, three big sins in one evening! 

But the storm clouds, flesh and days, though scary do not really bother me. I mean, if I hadn't indulged my craving; then yeah, I would've been scared and really ticked off! But now, replete as I am...I say to the Good Lord, 'Bring it on'! That is, if He is ticked off, which am pretty sure the all-knowing Lord wouldn't be, having tasted Fried Ice-cream. If not, that'd be a real pity indeed! Not to be worried, I am pretty sure, the Lord can whip up a batch for Himself with my recipe.

Would you just look at that! How can the Lord be ticked off with that on offer?

 For those of you like me, who crave for ice-cream even in the chilly evenings of winter, this is the perfect dessert. If you feel it's too cold outside to eat ice-cream, just fry it. It follows the same theory of heating up something that is cold, I think. Once the ice-cream is fried, slosh some glossy, thick chocolate sauce over it. Lo and behold, you've got a marriage made in heaven! Now add some crunch with a sprinkling of chopped nuts. And you've just elevated it to a whole new level. With each mouthful, you get to savour the decadence of the chocolate, the heart-warming crunch of the hot crust and the icy-cool, still not melted ice-cream. Yumm! You know, there are very few things I think the Chinese have got right...this is definitely on top of that list.

Recipe

Fried Ice-cream with Chocolate Sauce

(Feeds as many or as few as you want/ or have the patience to fry)

Ingredients

500ml Vanilla Ice-cream 

1 pack Brittania Vita Marie Biscuits, crushed roughly

2 eggs, beaten well

Oil for deep frying

To Serve

Chocolate Ganache 

Chopped almonds

Directions

1. Line a tray that fits into your freezer compartment with foil. Using an ice-cream scoop, form 6 balls of ice-cream and place on the prepared tray. You can shape it slightly between your palms, but not for too long. Freeze for at least 2 hours.

2. Spread the biscuit crumbs on a shallow dish. Take each ball of ice-cream out of the freezer and give it a roll in the biscuit crumbs until neatly coated. Return to the freezer immediately. Freeze for a further 30 minutes. The reason I recommend taking each ice-cream ball out is so that the other ice-cream balls don't melt while you finish rolling all of them.

3. Once your 30 minutes are up, again taking each crumbed ice-cream out roll it in the beaten egg until you've coated it. Then quickly roll it in the crumbs until you have an even coat. Repeat with the rest of the ice-cream balls and freeze for 40-50 minutes. If you want a thicker crust, repeat the process again. I always do.

4. Heat the oil in a deep-bottom pot. Now remember that you want the oil to be really hot, so that the crust browns almost immediately. Leave it too late, you risk the ice-cream melting in the oil. Believe me, you don't want that. To check if the oil is really hot, drop a tiny bit of  the crushed biscuit into the oil and if it browns immediately it's hot enough. Lower the crumb-coated ice-cream one at a time into their oily bath. Fry till golden brown, about 30-40 seconds. Remove and place on plate. 

Enrobe the deep-fried, golden goodness with that silky chocolate ganache and add a smattering of chopped almonds and serve immediately to your awed guests and wait for the praise. Repeat with the rest. Oh! and don't forget to stuff your face too. Trust me, you wan't regret it.

Chocolate Ganache 

Ingredients

8 ounces (227 grams) semisweet or bittersweet chocolate, cut into small pieces
3/4 cup (180 ml) heavy whipping cream
2 tablespoons (28 grams) unsalted butter

Directions

Place the chopped chocolate in a medium sized heatproof bowl. Set aside. Heat the cream and butter in a small saucepan over medium heat. (Can also heat the cream and butter in the microwave.) Bring just to a boil. Immediately pour the boiling cream over the chocolate and allow to stand, without stirring, for a few minutes. Stir gently (as you do not want to incorporate air into the ganache) with a spoon or whisk until smooth.

Now go fry yourselves some ice-cream while I have a discussion with God.

Dear Lord,

I know I have sinned, but seriously can you blame me? It was your fault really. It was you who gave the idea to that wretched man who invented fried ice-cream. Had you not done that, we wouldn't be having this conversation at all. Well if you're still angry, here's a thought. The next time you're down here we can have that discussion on how many 'Hail Marys' I owe you. Or maybe I can make some fried ice-cream for ya. :) So what say, forgiven? ;)

P.S. we can always say that evil-spawn Satan put us in the way of temptation. With all the blame the guy gets, what's another? :P 

All my love,

Chaitanya